I FIGURED IT OUT
Unfortunately, I just don't think it's going to work out. Honestly, I think it sucks because she's great, but here's why it wouldn't work.
1. I've hung out with her several times this week and still haven't felt a real connection. It's fun, but not "where'd the time go?" fun.
2. She admitted to me last night that she doesn't swear, and doesn't like to hear it. That's kind of a damn hell ass problem for me... there's just no way I can hold that back forever.
3. She hasn't dated in years. Technically, that's fine if I really like someone, but chances are if we started dating she would take it more seriously than me, and I don't see it getting serious with her.
It may sound like excuses, but it's not like that. I was hoping I would discover that I like her more from hanging out with her, but it didn't turn out that way. I'm not sure where to go from here. I like spending time with her, but I think we need to keep it at friends. How am I going to tell her?
We've never held hands, kissed or even cuddled... but it's obvious there's interest there. I need to say something... delicately. ....thoughts?
Unfortunately, I just don't think it's going to work out. Honestly, I think it sucks because she's great, but here's why it wouldn't work.
1. I've hung out with her several times this week and still haven't felt a real connection. It's fun, but not "where'd the time go?" fun.
2. She admitted to me last night that she doesn't swear, and doesn't like to hear it. That's kind of a damn hell ass problem for me... there's just no way I can hold that back forever.
3. She hasn't dated in years. Technically, that's fine if I really like someone, but chances are if we started dating she would take it more seriously than me, and I don't see it getting serious with her.
It may sound like excuses, but it's not like that. I was hoping I would discover that I like her more from hanging out with her, but it didn't turn out that way. I'm not sure where to go from here. I like spending time with her, but I think we need to keep it at friends. How am I going to tell her?
We've never held hands, kissed or even cuddled... but it's obvious there's interest there. I need to say something... delicately. ....thoughts?
posted by Composer at 11:04 AM
3 Comments:
Ok, HUH?! She hasn't dated in years?!?!?!? Ok. It's one thing for ME to say I haven't dated in years (LOL!)....but for a twenty some year old to say they haven't....that's just ODD. Doesn't that strike anyone else as....a bit fucked up?!
~*!*~!*~!* WARNING BELLS ~*!*~!*~*!
[shaking head]
The no profanity thing. Yeah. I'm sorry. That wouldn't fly with me. I mean, take me for example. It's ME, part of my personality. And sure, obviously when it's *completely* inappropriate I make a conscious effort to refrain from using it. But in my day to day life, personality....this is me. Take me as I am. Dealbreaker. And maybe that makes me shallow. But hell, you know? It's that the point, to find someone who likes you, falls in love with YOU. As you ARE. No?!??!?!
;)
As far as help breaking it off gently. Fuck. I suck at that. Just bc mainly I've had NO practice at that. I pretty much married a man I couldn't break up with. Uh. Yeah. That ended badly sixteen years later. *snort!* I'm sorry I can't be of more help there. Possibly one of your other followers ;) will have some better advice.
Several things I just thought of though. Try to be honest. Tell her you don't feel it clicking. That YOU are looking for someone to date and it just doesn't seem to 'be' there.
Does that help???? LMAO!
yeah, I probably should have clarified... she went to an all girls college. She's also pretty into church. So the combination of a busy undergrad where there weren't any boys, and she's picky due to her morals... it starts to make more sense... (but still... years?)
I hear ya. It sucks to want to be what someone needs (I'd love to be able to never swear again... but that ain't happening).
Yeah... I'm having a tough time figuring this out because we HAVEN'T done ANYTHING... but we've been hanging out a lot. If anything, it's more of a clarifying where we're at... I guess. The worst part is I'm still not 100% sure this is the right thing... she's fucking great in a lot of ways!
Ya know, just end it. It sounds more like friends anyway so just lay it on the line. Keep looking!
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